In less than 60 days I will turn 25 if you ask anyone in my life I have accomplished nothing. Why, you ask because I am not dating/ married (and I don't see this changing anytime soon). When I say dating I me steady dating (boyfriend/girlfriend)
I am a college graduate with 2 master degrees in History and Genetics (weird combination, that another story). Starting in September I will be starting a fantastic job in my field at one of the nation's top hospital. But this means nothing to my parents they just want to see me married off already. I never been that girl that saw a future in which I was married. I didn't think I live to see 16 much less 25 than I went away to school. College and grad school were not easy in any way, shape or form. So dating and marriage took a back seat. Most if not all my friends from college have either dated, dating, engaged ,or married. I was boy crazy in my early years of college cause that what I thought I was suppose to be or what was "normal". Don't get me wrong I like guys just fine but I never saw myself dating anyone. I was never girlfriend material I was always friend zoned and weirdly never bothered me. I had too much going on in my crazy, insane life to involve someone else. I finally got my head on the right way and I am still in no rush to start dating or get married.
I was or might still be way to selfish to be in a serious relationship with anyone right now. I was too focused on school or my sickness or why when 1 good thing happen to me 5 bad happen right after. A boyfriend I think needs attention ie calling, texting, Skype. I hate talking on the phone for long periods of time, love texting but emotion get lost in translation and I've only use Skype like 3 times and all time was kind of weird. I am not super emotional and don't express myself clearly ever. People say when I find that one guy I will want to do all those things in more. UMMM ok! Also I am not that big fan of dates thing I feel you have to go on in order to date. In the past 3 years I have been about 7 or 8 dates total. Sad fact but true. Dates to me can be an awkward thing that sometime feels forced. But in last year Ive been willing trying to make the extra effort to enjoy dates and go on them. So maybe my thoughts will change on the subject soon.
Marriage is this big scary thing that I don't even feel I am old enough to undertake. A lot of my friends are married and they love it. At 21 or 22 I was out of my mind and had so many issues and debt. To bring that into a marriage would have smelled disaster from the beginning. Most of that baggage has been let go of but I still don't feel like marriage for me would work out. I am still going and changing into a women. I don't even want a '"real" wedding. Cost too much. Kids are still I big question mark for me, I am still on fence wheter I want them or not. So much going on in my head about this topics. Don't get me wrong I am not against marriage or dating but I just dont see either in my furture.
Here is the first rant....
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